Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
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