you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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