Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
