saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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