When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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