apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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