Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
