Your tits are I can't wait for
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
