when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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