super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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