we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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