If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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