Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
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You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
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Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
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