We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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