dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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