Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
