So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize