Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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