So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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