Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
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it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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