He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize