Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Randomize
