Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
