Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
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We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
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No...this little piggys going to the bar
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.