I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
