one might say we're banned from that church
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
