it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
