Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
