69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
