R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
