We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
