Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
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I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
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Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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