I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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