I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
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Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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