would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
