I'm jealous of your bromance
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
