just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.