Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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