Whatcha textin bout Willis?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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