If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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