I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
