How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
