tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
