I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
