ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
