I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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