no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
