btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
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Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
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Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.