Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Randomize
