1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize