do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
